Flash Fiction / writing prompts

The Jade Camel #6

Chris Hall71 Comments

Previously

‘The figurine is near, Patterson,’ the tall, turban-clad woman turned to her elegantly-suited companion, ‘I can tell, the vibration is strong,’ a smile spread across her carmine lips and her floor-length fur coat swayed as she swept across the deck of the RMS Redemption. The crew was preparing the vessel for disembarkation; following in her wake, Patterson with a graceful wave of his hand, signalled to a nearby lacky to attend to the mundane task of handling their luggage.

On the quayside, Joey broke open a new pack of cigarettes; he shoved the cellophane and silver paper into his pocket and drew out a battered yellow matchbox, turning from the malodorous Mersey breeze, a cigarette clamped between his lips. The match broke as he struck it, Joey cursed and fumbled another match from the box.

An arm, with a precise half-inch of shirt cuff showing from a fine grey-wool sleeve, proffered a flame from a silver lighter; the end of Joey’s cigarette flared and he inhaled deeply, nodding his thanks. The owner of the arm held the young man’s eyes with a hypnotic blue-grey stare; a regal-looking woman appeared at his side, extending her hand and smiling a red-lipped smile.

Written in response to two challenges:

Di of Pensitivity 101’s Wednesday’s Three Things Challenge: YELL, CELL, TELL
Denise Farley of GirlieOnTheEdge’s Sunday’s Six Sentence Story Word Prompt: MUNDANE

Read more #SixSentenceStories here

Photo credit: illustration from a book somewhere on my bookshelves which I STILL cannot locate 😉

71 thoughts on “The Jade Camel #6”

  3. * the sound of the reel ending and the lights of the theater turn on: intermission…* 👏
    Cinematographic post/noir quality!!

    Ps: sentences 3 & 4 brought to my memory my grandfather so vividly! He did the exact same moves, even with the broken match.
    Thank you.

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      • well, no!… they are not in the flickering black-and-white film reel… they are, like, yesterday
        lol
        coolest thing about these stories?
        coming across, “cellophane and silver paper”
        don’t get weirded-out, but I can remember the feel of the silver paper… which covered the ends of the cigarettes, a little semi-square that looked metallic but felt like worn-out velvet

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  10. Ooh, there’s a chill running through me now! Watch out, Joey! How is it that ‘a precise half-inch of shirt cuff showing from a fine grey-wool sleeve’ can be so menacing? You use language beautifully, Chris.

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  17. Oo er! Quite a menacing couple here, with lackeys in tow to boot!
    And Joey is totally oblivious!
    (You’ll need to write a slightly extended version, Chris, for those of us who want more! Hehehe! 😊 Although, we’ll have to wait for the next part otherwise…)

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  22. A touch of the exotic lands at the docks… a silver lighter trumps the match (I wonder if the lighter was a Ronson like the silver ones my grandparents had?). I hope Joey can keep his wits, he might need them soon. Excellent, Chris!

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  24. The plot thickens! That arm reaching out with the shirt cuff sounds like something that would happen to Tommy of “Tommy and Tuppence” fame. Right when you least expect it! And usually it ended with him getting kidnapped😬

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