Flash Fiction / SSS / writing prompts

The Jade Camel #20

Chris Hall62 Comments

Previously

‘I lost him!’ Gary panted through the side window of the van, ‘I followed him into the park but he jumped over the wall… I think he’s back in the house,’ his eyes slid to the building where Patterson and his cronies were waiting; one of their number had also just pitched up, red-cheeked from running.

A nerve in Patterson’s temple twitched as he took out his keys and strode over to his car; beckoning to two of his crew, he indicated the now-open boot: one retrieved a crow-bar and the other a stubby-handled axe.

‘They’re going in!’ Gary’s voice rose half an octave with anxiety as the front door began to splinter.

As the door gave way, Joey launched himself over the banister, kicking wildly, taking two of the intruders down as he swung to the floor; spinning away from the man who was wielding the axe and snatching the crow-bar from where it’d fallen; with a mighty roar, Joey raised the crow-bar, smashing it against bone and flesh, Patterson was the last to crumple.

Joey stumbled outside, allowing the crow-bar to clatter to the ground.

‘In here, mate!’ Gary beckoned from the open back door of the van.

next episode

Written in response to two challenges:

Di of Pensitivity 101’s Wednesday’s Three Things Challenge: ANXIETY, CHEEK, NERVE
Denise Farley of Girlie On The Edge’s Sunday’s Six Sentence Story Word Prompt: KEY

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Photo credit: illustration from a book somewhere on my bookshelves which has mysteriously disappeared🐪

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62 thoughts on “The Jade Camel #20”

  19. Joey! Dude!
    Excellent action scene. Rising tension, I think I saw another commentor write.
    (It’s not secret that I get as much from studying the technique (of other Sixarians) as do from the entertainment of the stories themselves. Gonna have to try more of what I think of as ‘live action’ such as what I see in this episode.)
    cool

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  24. So cool Chris, just caught up with the last couple of episodes I missed, each building the tension to this week’s episode of pacey action and violence… so pleased Gary was at hand in the van! I wonder if Patterson, though crumpled, is not entirely out?

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  25. The Camel awakens! And feeds on adrenalin and violence!? It would appear that’s part of it… I think, lol
    Great bit of action, Chris!
    That’s one jade camel Joey’s walking around with. Can’t wait to discover it’s origins.

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    • Thanks, Denise!
      The camel’s origins seem to be cloaked within its dark and murky past, although we can see the power it holds. Cynthia (who was first to cross the fourth wall in an out-take from this series) was always rather vague about where the camel came from. All that I could get out of her was that it was once given to her by an admirer, who subsequently came to a sticky end…

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